John Solis

John Solis used to believe in the San Diego Chargers. Now he doesn't believe in anything.

Author Archive

In-Season Articles

In-Season Articles

The Solis Report, Pre-Draft Special Part II: An Idiot’s Guide to the 2019 Rookie Class, 1.01-1.12

Man, I feel like one of those guys on “House Surgery” or “House Eye for the House Guy” because I look around RotoViz today and it’s unrecognizable! Have you clicked some of these links? This site is a straight up stunner. They used to say Steve Jobs’ brilliance was in showing you what you didn’t even realize you desperately needed. It almost makes me want…...

The Solis Report: Pre-Draft Special

These days, I’m not sleeping well. Every time I close my eyes a certain number burns bright against the red-black darkness of my inner eyelids. I wake up exhausted and drag myself as if underwater to the bathroom, little more than a spectator in my own life. Beneath the white noise of the shower, a low and sinister whisper: “32 Jokes™.” I shake my head and…...

The Freedman Report Week 15: Cam Newton Wishes on a Monkey’s Paw

Ah, your season is over. You look back and count your mistakes. You start gearing up for the 2017 draft, even though Nick Chubb and Royce Freeman are no longer going to be a part of it. Ugh. You’re depressed, now. Denny Carter starts making sense. And yet, shimmering in the distance: 32 jokes that never cared whether you won or lost in the first place…....

The Freedman Report Week 12: Westworld

[Like so many wild horses, spoilers roam freely here. If such unpleasant business gets you a bit namby-pamby, kindly skedaddle and thanks for the click.]…...

The Freedman Report Week 6: Lamar Miller Coughs Into His Fist, Odell Beckham Jr. Jumps the Shark, and Other Tales

Man, I can’t believe the Chargers won. It’s been a non-stop celebration since last Thursday. I’m not even sure I remember any of the games except that one. But, as Maggie says, “You don’t even need to watch the games to write this column. Nothing needs to happen at all.” San Diego Chargers If this team was going to win even once more before San…...

The Freedman Report Week 4: “Coolio Jones” and Several Other Great Rap References

Last week, savvy readers realized that I had spelled “Christine Michael” with the first letter of each heading. That’s why I listed “Indianapolis Colts” three times. This week, I am so zonked out on cold medication that the most interesting thing I’ll probably do is reference last weeks’ easter eggs. It’s gonna be a rough one. But I was this close to not even doing it this…...

The Freedman Report Week 1: Love, Loss, and the Big Fat Told-Ya-So

Every year, without fail, Week 1 teaches us “lessons” that probably won’t have much staying power against the backdrop of an entire season. If I were writing this column after Week 1 of last year, I’d probably have spent four paragraphs on Darren Fells. I’d have called him “Darren Fellskowski.” The heading would’ve been “How I Fells in Love with Darren.” You get the idea. Recognizing…...

2016 NFL Draft Impact – AFC West

In seven rounds, with a total of 32 picks, the AFC West collectively managed to draft eight players who might make a difference on your fantasy team. Of those eight, only three were selected in the first three rounds. Are you as amped as I am!? LETS DO THIS. A word about non-skill positions, generally I’m not trying to shit on Joey Bosa. I like…...

My Favorite Dynasty Buy Low – Eddie Lacy

This post is part of a series of articles where various RotoViz writers name their favorite buy low for dynasty fantasy football, with a look at the 2016 NFL season and beyond. At the conclusion of the series, the authors will get together to rank the various nominations in one final post. In this installment, John Solis discusses his pick, Eddie Lacy…....

Preseason Dynasty ADP vs Positional Finishes: RB vs WR

Have you heard that new song all the kids are listening to? It’s called “ZeroRB,” and it’s the latest and greatest from famed European House DJ Shawn Siegele. Wait, what do you mean “it came out three years ago”?…...

Dynasty Impact Week 15: David Johnson, Cam Newton, and the Return of the King

In dynasty, your season is never over. At least, that’s what I keep telling myself because I have definitely been mostly eliminated from contention at this point. Even though all sensible leagues are currently locked down as the championship game looms, real-life NFL players remain blissfully unaware that their on-field actions are affecting their all-important dynasty values! Let’s take a look at some of week…...

The Solis Report, Pre-Draft Special Part II: An Idiot’s Guide to the 2019 Rookie Class, 1.01-1.12

Man, I feel like one of those guys on “House Surgery” or “House Eye for the House Guy” because I look around RotoViz today and it’s unrecognizable! Have you clicked some of these links? This site is a straight up stunner. They used to say Steve Jobs’ brilliance was in showing you what you didn’t even realize you desperately needed. It almost makes me want…...

The Solis Report: Pre-Draft Special

These days, I’m not sleeping well. Every time I close my eyes a certain number burns bright against the red-black darkness of my inner eyelids. I wake up exhausted and drag myself as if underwater to the bathroom, little more than a spectator in my own life. Beneath the white noise of the shower, a low and sinister whisper: “32 Jokes™.” I shake my head and…...

The Freedman Report Week 15: Cam Newton Wishes on a Monkey’s Paw

Ah, your season is over. You look back and count your mistakes. You start gearing up for the 2017 draft, even though Nick Chubb and Royce Freeman are no longer going to be a part of it. Ugh. You’re depressed, now. Denny Carter starts making sense. And yet, shimmering in the distance: 32 jokes that never cared whether you won or lost in the first place…....

The Freedman Report Week 12: Westworld

[Like so many wild horses, spoilers roam freely here. If such unpleasant business gets you a bit namby-pamby, kindly skedaddle and thanks for the click.]…...

The Freedman Report Week 6: Lamar Miller Coughs Into His Fist, Odell Beckham Jr. Jumps the Shark, and Other Tales

Man, I can’t believe the Chargers won. It’s been a non-stop celebration since last Thursday. I’m not even sure I remember any of the games except that one. But, as Maggie says, “You don’t even need to watch the games to write this column. Nothing needs to happen at all.” San Diego Chargers If this team was going to win even once more before San…...

The Freedman Report Week 4: “Coolio Jones” and Several Other Great Rap References

Last week, savvy readers realized that I had spelled “Christine Michael” with the first letter of each heading. That’s why I listed “Indianapolis Colts” three times. This week, I am so zonked out on cold medication that the most interesting thing I’ll probably do is reference last weeks’ easter eggs. It’s gonna be a rough one. But I was this close to not even doing it this…...

The Freedman Report Week 1: Love, Loss, and the Big Fat Told-Ya-So

Every year, without fail, Week 1 teaches us “lessons” that probably won’t have much staying power against the backdrop of an entire season. If I were writing this column after Week 1 of last year, I’d probably have spent four paragraphs on Darren Fells. I’d have called him “Darren Fellskowski.” The heading would’ve been “How I Fells in Love with Darren.” You get the idea. Recognizing…...

2016 NFL Draft Impact – AFC West

In seven rounds, with a total of 32 picks, the AFC West collectively managed to draft eight players who might make a difference on your fantasy team. Of those eight, only three were selected in the first three rounds. Are you as amped as I am!? LETS DO THIS. A word about non-skill positions, generally I’m not trying to shit on Joey Bosa. I like…...

My Favorite Dynasty Buy Low – Eddie Lacy

This post is part of a series of articles where various RotoViz writers name their favorite buy low for dynasty fantasy football, with a look at the 2016 NFL season and beyond. At the conclusion of the series, the authors will get together to rank the various nominations in one final post. In this installment, John Solis discusses his pick, Eddie Lacy…....

Preseason Dynasty ADP vs Positional Finishes: RB vs WR

Have you heard that new song all the kids are listening to? It’s called “ZeroRB,” and it’s the latest and greatest from famed European House DJ Shawn Siegele. Wait, what do you mean “it came out three years ago”?…...

Dynasty Impact Week 15: David Johnson, Cam Newton, and the Return of the King

In dynasty, your season is never over. At least, that’s what I keep telling myself because I have definitely been mostly eliminated from contention at this point. Even though all sensible leagues are currently locked down as the championship game looms, real-life NFL players remain blissfully unaware that their on-field actions are affecting their all-important dynasty values! Let’s take a look at some of week…...

The Solis Report, Pre-Draft Special Part II: An Idiot’s Guide to the 2019 Rookie Class, 1.01-1.12

Man, I feel like one of those guys on “House Surgery” or “House Eye for the House Guy” because I look around RotoViz today and it’s unrecognizable! Have you clicked some of these links? This site is a straight up stunner. They used to say Steve Jobs’ brilliance was in showing you what you didn’t even realize you desperately needed. It almost makes me want…...

The Solis Report: Pre-Draft Special

These days, I’m not sleeping well. Every time I close my eyes a certain number burns bright against the red-black darkness of my inner eyelids. I wake up exhausted and drag myself as if underwater to the bathroom, little more than a spectator in my own life. Beneath the white noise of the shower, a low and sinister whisper: “32 Jokes™.” I shake my head and…...

The Freedman Report Week 15: Cam Newton Wishes on a Monkey’s Paw

Ah, your season is over. You look back and count your mistakes. You start gearing up for the 2017 draft, even though Nick Chubb and Royce Freeman are no longer going to be a part of it. Ugh. You’re depressed, now. Denny Carter starts making sense. And yet, shimmering in the distance: 32 jokes that never cared whether you won or lost in the first place…....

The Freedman Report Week 12: Westworld

[Like so many wild horses, spoilers roam freely here. If such unpleasant business gets you a bit namby-pamby, kindly skedaddle and thanks for the click.]…...

The Freedman Report Week 6: Lamar Miller Coughs Into His Fist, Odell Beckham Jr. Jumps the Shark, and Other Tales

Man, I can’t believe the Chargers won. It’s been a non-stop celebration since last Thursday. I’m not even sure I remember any of the games except that one. But, as Maggie says, “You don’t even need to watch the games to write this column. Nothing needs to happen at all.” San Diego Chargers If this team was going to win even once more before San…...

The Freedman Report Week 4: “Coolio Jones” and Several Other Great Rap References

Last week, savvy readers realized that I had spelled “Christine Michael” with the first letter of each heading. That’s why I listed “Indianapolis Colts” three times. This week, I am so zonked out on cold medication that the most interesting thing I’ll probably do is reference last weeks’ easter eggs. It’s gonna be a rough one. But I was this close to not even doing it this…...

The Freedman Report Week 1: Love, Loss, and the Big Fat Told-Ya-So

Every year, without fail, Week 1 teaches us “lessons” that probably won’t have much staying power against the backdrop of an entire season. If I were writing this column after Week 1 of last year, I’d probably have spent four paragraphs on Darren Fells. I’d have called him “Darren Fellskowski.” The heading would’ve been “How I Fells in Love with Darren.” You get the idea. Recognizing…...

2016 NFL Draft Impact – AFC West

In seven rounds, with a total of 32 picks, the AFC West collectively managed to draft eight players who might make a difference on your fantasy team. Of those eight, only three were selected in the first three rounds. Are you as amped as I am!? LETS DO THIS. A word about non-skill positions, generally I’m not trying to shit on Joey Bosa. I like…...

My Favorite Dynasty Buy Low – Eddie Lacy

This post is part of a series of articles where various RotoViz writers name their favorite buy low for dynasty fantasy football, with a look at the 2016 NFL season and beyond. At the conclusion of the series, the authors will get together to rank the various nominations in one final post. In this installment, John Solis discusses his pick, Eddie Lacy…....

Preseason Dynasty ADP vs Positional Finishes: RB vs WR

Have you heard that new song all the kids are listening to? It’s called “ZeroRB,” and it’s the latest and greatest from famed European House DJ Shawn Siegele. Wait, what do you mean “it came out three years ago”?…...

Dynasty Impact Week 15: David Johnson, Cam Newton, and the Return of the King

In dynasty, your season is never over. At least, that’s what I keep telling myself because I have definitely been mostly eliminated from contention at this point. Even though all sensible leagues are currently locked down as the championship game looms, real-life NFL players remain blissfully unaware that their on-field actions are affecting their all-important dynasty values! Let’s take a look at some of week…...

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