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Terminated! Train Wrecked

This column chronicles the ups and downs of the team drafted with three friends in the FFPC’s Terminator contest – one player from our roster must be eliminated each week. The first installment outlined the tournament rules.

Welcome back to the slow-motion train wreck that is our Terminator team.

When we last left you, the cargo train had jack-knifed somewhere in its middle, and some of the cars were dangling precariously off the edge of the bridge high above the canyon, but there was hope that damage could be mitigated and perhaps much of the train could be saved. However, I regret to inform you that not only did those cars plunge to the depths of the valley below, but they pulled much of the rest of the train down with them.

Despite finally getting RB1 performances from both Tevin Coleman and Duke Johnson, we finished last in points in Week 9 because neither of our remaining quarterbacks – Jameis Winston and Ryan Tannehill – played, and both Stefon Diggs and Allen Robinson sat out with injuries. However, with Zach Ertz and Evan Engram both on bye, our replacement tight end, Blake Jarwin, recorded his career high in fantasy points, just like we knew he would when we drafted him.1

Amazingly, another team – the third one this year – failed to eliminate a player by the Sunday deadline and was disqualified from the contest. This team had been in third place and had the week’s best performers at their positions in Alvin Kamara and Michael Thomas, plus solid games from Cooper Kupp, Juju Smith-Schuster and Jordan Howard. And even though this team posted zero points in Week 9, it’s still ahead of our squad, which remained in eighth place.


I actually would have considered giving that guy his $350 entry fee back just to take over his team.2

Of course, as I’ve mentioned before, we started off in the hole by drafting Le’Veon Bell with the third overall pick. One guy has changed the name of two of his Terminator teams to variations of Le’Veon Owes Me $350, which I wholeheartedly endorse.

But you, Blake Jarwin, you don’t owe us anything, except a trip to the depths of the waiver wire, because you’ve been terminated. Hasta la vista, Blakey.


  1. He posted 2 catches for 15 yards.  (back)
  2. This offer might be open to other top teams in our league, if any of them happen to be reading this.  (back)

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