What do you do when you just can’t wait for the end of the season to determine the FFPC Super Bracket winner? You get in on some side action!
We were facing up against high-stakes veteran and all-around good guy Dan Williamson (@OverHypedSleepr) this week, and Dan came at us with an offer of side action through the FFPC’s on-site wagering system.
Now Deshaun of the Dead came into Week 4 riding high. We had just ripped off a 165-point performance to maintain our perfect record and hold on first place, and things were looking up for our squad. But the FFPC projections still had us as underdogs, even despite Dan’s team already logging a mediocre 7.7 points from Marquez Valdes-Scantling from the Thursday night game.
But who needs math and projections anyway? As long-time readers know, that’s just not how we do things here at RotoViz, and I’m not one to turn down a challenge.
Look, sometimes you just need to man up and make sub-optimal decisions so you don’t come off as some huge nerd who writes for a stats site and advocates for low-testosterone strategies like not drafting any running backs. You need to look that other owner in the eye and let him know you’re not afraid of his team of chumps, and you’re willing to lay down a fresh, crisp Andrew Jackson to prove it. Are you trying to scare me with that Gardner Minshew Twitter avatar, Dan? You think that’s swag? I’ll show you some swag, bring it on!
Unfortunately, it turns out that Dan did, in fact, bring it on. Sure, we left some points on the board by not starting Diontae Johnson over D.J. Chark as I will remind Monty I was advocating. But when Monty writes a whole Week 3 post about how it’s Chark Week and how we’ve been missing on all the points with him on our bench, you just know we’re going to start him and have him suck. It’s pretty much a foregone conclusion at that point, and definitive proof that we humans have no control over our actions, but are just carried along on the river of fate, predestined to suffer and fail at every turn despite the illusion of control.
Looking forward to Week 5 though, it appears we’re up against an owner who has already abandoned all hope and lit his $750 entry fee on fire.
Now, he will likely replace his players on bye with guys from his bench before the game starts, but that still leaves him with Jeff Wilson as his RB2,1 and literally no starter at the tight end position.2 This is the type of matchup we absolutely have to win, which means everyone should probably play a Matt Ryan and Calvin Ridley stack in DFS this week as they will be connecting for four touchdowns to give us the worst beat of all time.
Would I like to bet on us again this week in this matchup? Yes, of course. However, I’m taking a lesson from last week and deciding that discretion is the better part of valor. It’s probably best not to remind this guy that this team exists and hope he just leaves his players on bye in the lineup.